Islamic Terrorism in India

Most Muslims are not terrorists, but most terrorists are Muslims

Standard Pakistani response template – must read

Posted by jagoindia on December 12, 2008

Dear Prime Minister Manmohan Singh/Atal Bihari Vajpayee/Narasimha Rao /Rajiv Gandhi,

Pakistan is shocked by/strongly condemns//is pleasantly surprised with the success of our “freedom fighters” in the loss of dozens/hundreds/thousands/ of innocent lives in the /terrorist attacks/bomb blasts/ sniper attack/hijacking/religious riots/other disaster that occurred in a busy marketplace/train/housing colony Indian parliament buildingan upper-class hotel / temple in Mumbai/Delhi/Kashmir / Assam / Punjab / Gujarat / Other.

The Pakistani citizens/soldiers/fidayeens/“friendship agents” / students who were caught red-handed / found dead at the scene of the crime / convicted of the crime are actually undercover Indian / American / Israeli agents. Any Pakistanis proven to be guilty of terrorism will be rewarded handsomely / dealt with severely / promoted to Lt. Colonel / given a new Indian passport and sent back to India / handed over to the Americans as proof of our commitment in the war on terror.

There are no Pakistani army-funded training camps / terrorist camps / madrasaas in Azad Kashmir / Afghanistan / Nepal / Bangladesh . The satellite images / photographs / eyewitness accounts / videotaped confessions obtained by the Indians is fraudulent / fake / inconclusive / are actually from Indian terrorist camps and part of a larger RAW / CIA conspiracy to destabilize the Pakistani government by stalling democracy / encouraging sectarian violence / undermining Pakistani institutions / causing the next military coup in Pakistan. A destabilized Pakistani government / mafia could cause Pakistan to become a dangerous nuclear WalMart / Target / Seven-Eleven and a terrorist breeding ground / university / research lab that would be worse for the world.

We hope this will not derail the peace process started with the recent India-Pakistan cricket series / Lahore bus yatra / Muzafarabad- Srinagar road opening / Bollywood peace concert / open borders initiative / other confidence-building measures. We look forward to justifying further attacks against innocent civilians / resolving the core issue of Kashmir / developing best-of-breed plausible deniability defenses.

We stand by / are plotting against our Indian brethren in their hour / days / years / decades of pain.


Asif Ali Zardari
President, Pakistan/Chief Operating Officer, Taliban Inc./General, Pakistani Army

3 Responses to “Standard Pakistani response template – must read”

  1. beena said

    Hahaha. How true. Those Paki snakes are truly insidious. Their comments ring so hollow but they continue to blatantly use it at every given opportunity.

  2. David said

    How sad for common Indian people who are victims of terrorist attacks one after another and the Indian government fooling people saying ‘India will not toelerate such attacks ANYMORE (saying everytime like a broken record)’ to protect minority vote bank and increaing their Swiss bank balances…’ the more sad part is these polititians are elected by Indian people themselves… Figure this one out please… No wonder India is a world’s joke…

  3. AR said

    NUKE em

    Destroy the Pakistanis.
    The Mumbai attack has ultimately shown how much the indian leadership cares about its people. Political jokers must be sennt to Pakistan and Nuke em again…..

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